10-day vipassana mediation course: The first day

This is one of multiple posts related to my experience at a 10-day meditation course. The first post is here.

I took my first course at Dhamma Mahavana in North Fork, CA. I was only about 4 hours away from the center by car so I drove myself. For those coming from out of town, a ride-share page is provided to try and coordinate rides which is especially useful for those flying in to a nearby airport. The centers tend to be in remote places and getting there by public transport can get quite expensive.

On arrival you have to checkin at the registration desk and get a room. As I mentioned in my earlier post, you have to fill out a paper version of the registration form that you filled out when you first registered for the course.

Room assignment

At this particular center, there are older dormitories with bunk beds and regular twin beds, and there are newer residence buildings with individual cells. There is a lot of emphasis on isolation, hence the individual cells. From what I know, most of the newer accommodations at existing centers tend to be individual cells. On my first course, I was assigned a bed in one of the dormitories and at my second course (also at the same center) I was assigned an individual cell. Regardless of the type of accommodation the bathrooms were shared. They have wheelbarrows to get your luggage from the car to your room.

Orientation

At around 5 pm on the day of arrival is a light meal followed by an orientation. In the orientation, we are told about the code of conduct, and various course logistics such as the location of the men's and women's areas. We are also asked once again to commit to beingat the course for the full duration and are given the opportunity to leave should we decide that it might not work for us. We are also told about the names of the assistant teachers for the course, and are introduced to the course managers -- one for men and one for women.

The course manager is the one that you are supposed to talk to about any logistical problems during the course and things like not feeling well, etc.

The assistant teachers are the ones who run the meditation sessions. They are also the ones who answer specific questions that one may have about the technique. There are two times in the day when one can ask questions of the teacher and I'll write more about this when I discuss the course schedule in a later post. It should be emphasized that they really are assistant teachers. The main teacher for the course is S. N. Goenka himself; the meditation instruction is provided via an audio recording and the discourses are provided via a video recording.

Seat assignment

Following orientation is a short break after which everyone assembles outside the meditation hall. There are separate entrances for men and women. The course manager starts calling names and assigns seat numbers; each one of us goes into the hall and occupies our assigned seats. That seat is the one that you use for the entire duration of the course. The teachers sit in front facing the rest of the hall, the course managers and the servers sit in the first row, and seats are typically assigned such that "old students" are towards the front, and "new students" towards the rear of the room.

The "seat" is simply a square foam cushion with a cover on it. There are additional cushions provided. The cushions are usually all gone by the second day of the course because people in pain keep adding different kinds of cushions.

When I took the course the first time, I picked up only one cushion. I found the base foam cushion very uncomfortable. Instead I chose to get rid of it and used a couple of blankets to take place of the cushion.

It would have been really nice to get some instruction on posture. Unfortunately none is provided and newbies tend to really struggle with trying to find the right posture. without correct posture, it becomes very difficult (almost masochistic) to try and hold steady for long periods of time. Fortunately, I had been meditating for some time and had been alerted to the issue about posture and already had a "favorite" one. I just had trouble being comfortable in that posture on the original base cushion and had to replace that with blankets.

From this point on, there really won't be an opportunity to speak so even though you'll be surrounded by the same group of people you won't be able to say a word to them!

The first sit

Following the seat assignments, there is a brief video discourse during which Goenka repeatedly refers to the course as a "deep surgical operation of the mind". He says it is bound to bring up unpleasant experiences and we should make a firm resolve to stay for the entire course no matter what unpleasantness we may have to deal with so that the operation can be brought to a proper completion rather than being halted abruptly.

After the discourse, there is audio instruction during which everyone is asked to formally make a request for instruction of the technique. The first steps of anapana are taught by taking everyone through a guided meditation.

Following the first sit, the period of "noble silence" begins for the next 10 days.

10-day vipassana meditation course: Registration

This is one of multiple posts related to my experience at a 10-day meditation course. The first post is here.

Registration for the course is quite easy. They have a website with online registration. You select a center -- they have several all over the world. Each center has its own course schedule posted. Even though the centers all teach the same course, they are actually supposed to be autonomous; each center maintains its own finances and has its own managing committee, all of who are unpaid volunteers (at least as far as I know).

Course availability

For each of the courses they list availability for men and women. Even if a course is wait-listed, there is usually a very good chance of being accepted in it. Because there is no charge for the course, there is nothing to be paid at the time of registration. As a result, many people register and then cancel later because they cannot make it. Courses around holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas fill up quite fast.

Once you have taken a full 10-day course, you are considered an "old student" (as opposed to a "new student"). As an old student, you are eligible to sit courses part-time (i.e. only attend a part of 10-day course), but even with old students, they usually give preference to those that want to sit the full 10-day course. Only old students are eligible for serving at a course and for enrolling for shorter duration courses (3-day and 1-day courses) and longer duration courses (30-day and 60-day courses).

Registration form

Once you decide on a course, you fill out the online registration form. You will be asked to read the code of conduct before filling out the form. There are a few weird things about the information that is requested. They ask about current spiritual practices and other forms of meditation that the applicant may have been exposed to. They ask about psychological health, medications, etc. I wasn't ever questioned about things I wrote but it's possible they may be trying to determine the suitability of the applicant to participate in such a course -- it is after all quite physically and psychologically demanding.

One thing I would recommend with the registration form is copying & pasting a copy of the responses. I didn't do that and I kind of regret it. If you go for subsequent courses, or if you cancel and reapply later, then you will have to answer all of the same questions again. Also -- and this is really weird -- you have to fill out the same form again in paper form when you arrive at the course.

Once the registration form is submitted you get contacted soon after, usually within a day or two, about whether you have been accepted into the course or placed on a waiting list. If registering for a course far in advance of the course date you will be requested to confirm your intent to attend two weeks before the beginning of the course.

10-day vipassana meditation course: Overview

In prior posts, I discussed my journey into meditation and various meditation techniques that I have been exposed to. This next series of posts are an attempt to capture my experience at a 10-day Vipassana meditation course taught by S. N. Goenka. I've attended 3 of these so far. The first one was in May 2007, the second was in July 2008, and the third was in June 2010. I took the first and second courses at the center in North Fork, CA, and did the third one at a newer center in Kelseyville, CA. This account is mostly about my first course, but I'll point out things that were significantly different between the courses.

I was quite apprehensive before the course, both because of concerns about being brainwashed, and also about the physical and mental discomfort that I knew would result from sitting for several hours of meditation each day. However, I decided to sign up anyway, because I was really attracted to the teachings as described to me by friends and acquaintances that had taken the course, and I expected it might transform my life. The latter despite often being told not to look at meditation as a quick fix to all of one's problems. For more about why I even got into meditation to begin with, you can read My journey into meditation.

I should mention a few things that I feel helped prepare me for the course. First, I personally knew several people that had taken this course. Of these I knew 2 quite well so I had the chance to ask several in-depth questions about the course including the type of instruction and the physical and mental strain induced by the course as well as what benefits I might get from attending it. Second, I had read The Art of Living: Vipassana Meditation by William Hart which is a Q&A-type discussion between the author and S. N. Goenka. That book does not give any clue about the actual course instruction but rather discusses the foundations of the technique and how it is designed to work. Finally, I had been meditating regularly for 5 years by the time I took the first course, so I had been exposed to what meditation was like, and the struggles of mind and body with being able to sit still and silent; however, as I was to find out later, meditating for such extended periods as done during the course is quite different and results in a very different experience.

I'll be discussing my experience in separate posts:

• Registration
• The first day
• Course schedule and instruction
• The technique
• Experiences during the course
• After the course

I should note that these posts are simply a description of my experience and can hopefully serve as a guide to what one might expect should they decide to take the course. It is not an attempt to persuade anyone to, or dissuade anyone from, taking the course.

Meditation techniques that I've been exposed to

An upfront caveat: I will have a few lines to describe the basics of each technique, but I really do not think it is possible to learn the technique from just those few lines. My description is based on my understanding of the technique and could potentially be incorrect. So please don't use this as a basis for practice. If something about a technique intrigues you, you should consult the references provided.

I earlier wrote about my journey into meditation and how I got started with the practice. I started in 2002 and since that time I've been exposed to several meditation techniques. This post discusses those techniques and provides references to the places and/or books from where I learned the technique.

Zen

As mentioned in my previous post, I was pointed to this technique by someone when I asked for help regarding challenges I was facing back in 1996. I was referred to Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind by Shunryu Suzuki, and that was my primary source for learning the technique. Zen meditation is simple -- it is all about focusing on the breath and gently letting go of all other thoughts. I only started regular practice of this technique in 2002 and only did it for about a year or so, at which point I started doing Vipassana.

Around that time, I also visited the Kannon Do Zen Meditation Center in Mountain View where they offer beginner instruction on Wednesdays.  I also stumbled upon Jikoji Zen Center during a random drive one weekend in the Santa Cruz mountains.

I spent a couple of days during Thanksgiving break in 2004 at Green Gulch, which is Zen monastery. By that time I was already practicing Vipassana, but I was looking for a place to get away for a couple of days. I spent a lot of time in sitting meditation. That was the first time I actually felt the tension in accumulated in my stomach (I've had hard-to-diagnose problems with digestion from as far back as I can remember). I wasn't able to release the tension, but at least I was able to feel it.

The Art of Living

I took an Art of Living class back in 2003. The class was 6 days -- Thursday and Friday evening, the entire day Saturday and Sunday, and then the evenings on the following Monday and Tuesday. The class taught several breathing exercises and the Sudarshan Kriya technique which was developed by Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. Many of the people taking the class reported profound experiences, but I really didn't experience anything out of the ordinary.  (Searching for Sudarshan Kriya on the Art of Living website will yield several links on the benefits, etc.)

Following this class, I just returned back to "watching the breath".

Hong Sau

My next course in meditation was the Hong Sau technique taught by the Ananda Sangha organization of Paramhansa Yogananda (the author of "Autobiography of a Yogi"). I took this course at the Sacramento center around 2004. The course consisted of instruction once a week for about 2 hours for 2 or 3 weeks.

The technique is very similar to "watching the breath" with the addition of coordinating the mental repetition of "Hong" with the in-breath and "Sau" with the out-breath. ("Hong" means "I am", Sau means "spirit".) They also taught some basic yoga exercises for energizing the body, but somehow those never resonated with me.

I continued with this technique for quite a while (perhaps a few months) after which I again returned to simply "watching the breath". One of the things that I developed during this course, was the ability to sense the breath as it was entering and leaving the nostrils. Prior to that, my focus point had always been the belly.

Vipassana

Bear with me -- this one is going to be long. There are 2 different techniques which are commonly referred to as Vipassana and I'll be talking about both of them.

I first heard about Vipassana when I had just started meditating in 2002. A co-worker was putting up brochures for the visit of S. N. Goenka who was to speak about this technique at the DeAnza College in Cupertino. I was naturally curious about it since I was just starting out in meditation. I went for the talk, and the technique really appealed to me particularly because of its simplicity and non-sectarian nature, but also because Goenka mentioned that it had helped him cure his migraines. Vipassana means insight or wisdom, and practicing the technique is supposed to develop these qualities in the meditator. I was very inspired by this talk and wanted to learn the technique. However, the only way to learn this technique was to take a 10-day long residential course. An attractive thing about the course is that there is no charge to register or attend the course. However, the duration of the course was the biggest deterrent for me. I was also worried about things like getting brainwashed. So I tabled the idea of doing that course.

In 2003 while getting my wisdom teeth extracted in India, my dentist mentioned this technique to me and said that it had helped her a lot. Again, taking 10 days off to practice meditation was something I simply couldn't come to terms with at the time.

I did eventually take the course in 2007. I'll devote an entire post to the course (see here), but in short, there are two parts to this technique -- Anapana and Vipassana. Anapana is the development of concentration by observing the breath. Once the mind has achieved a reasonable level of concentration, the practice of Vipassana in which the sensations are observed begins. Observing the sensations without reacting to them eventually leads to liberation from craving and aversion. And as taught by the Buddha, craving and aversion are the cause of all suffering.

I have since found two other resources for learning this style of Vipassana, but I haven't used either. I just thought I'd mention them for someone that might be interested in finding out more about the technique without having to spend a full 10 days on it. One of them is Marshall Glikman's book Beyond the Breath: Extraordinary Mindfulness Through Whole-Body Vipassana Meditation. The other is another organization by S. N. Goenka's teacher, Sayagyi U Ba Khin, called the International Meditation Center which allows you to experience just the first 3 days of the course.

Before I took this course, between 2004 and 2007, I practiced a slightly different technique, but one which is also commonly referred to as Vipassana.

When I relocated to the Sacramento area in 2003, I looked around for a group to practice and learn meditation with and came across the Sacramento Buddhist Meditation Group. They meet every Sunday and have a guest speaker. Every month they have someone teach a 15-minute introduction to meditation to either the Zen or Vipassana styles. I went for an introductory course which was being taught by Dennis Warren. A few months later, I signed up for a 8 week course that met Monday evenings taught by Dennis at his group, Sacramento Insight Meditation. When I went for this course, I thought that the technique would be similar to that taught by Goenka. It is only much later that I found out that the two are really quite different.

In a nutshell, this technique uses four foundations -- the breath, the body, the mind, and the emotions. The observation of breath is used as an anchor to develop concentration and then as other things arise, e.g. a sensation in the body such as pain or tingling, a wandering of the mind into the past or the future, or an emotion such as sadness or anger, those are explored in further detail, and we return once again to the breath.

One of the best books I've found on this technique is Mindfulness in Plain English by Bhante Gunaratana. The book is available on the Internet for free in both html and pdf formats. The author runs a monastery called the Bhavana Society in West Virginia. Other places where this technique is taught are the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, Massachusetts, and Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Marin County, California.

Other techniques

Along the way, I was exposed to Jon Kabat-Zinn's work on Mindfulness-based Stress Reduction (MBSR), of which Mindfulness Meditation is a part. This was around 2004-2005. I bought the Mindfulness Meditation CDs and used them a few times. For some reason, though, I never felt drawn to this.

Another book that I found interesting was Osho's Meditation: The First and Last Freedom which describes 63 different meditation techniques! Fortunately, they are described very briefly, probably to just give a reader a flavor of each technique.  (While the link points to the edition that I have which is now out of print, a newer edition may be available at the Osho Bookstore.)

I've also heard a lot about transcendental meditation (TM). TM is taught by the organization of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi and also by other spiritual teachers such as Radha Soami of Beas. I have not had a chance to practice the technique taught by either of these. The latter is much less accessible because, before being initiated into the technique, one has to accept Radha Soami as one's spiritual teacher and take a vow to follow all of his precepts for one's entire life. From what I understand, TM is a "mantra-based" practice where you mentally repeat a specific mantra given at the time of initiation.

What do I practice now?

I'm back to just watching the breath. I found Vipassana too difficult to practice on a daily basis so I fell back to just doing Anapana. When practicing Vipassana, I felt my life getting harder and harder, and I thought meditation was supposed to make things easier! For now Anapana seems to be working reasonably well for me. It keeps me practicing and also seems to offer benefits through the rest of the day. As always, this is true only as of this writing and is subject to change.

Useful "rules of thumb" for home buying

I don't own a home yet, but every time I think of buying one I do some research and find some useful information.  I've read each of these in different places at different times and this is my attempt to consolidate all of them.

What are the costs to be aware of?

• Mortgage payments covering principal and interest.
• Property taxes.
• Home owner's Insurance.
• HOA dues. Usually for condos, but nowadays many gated communities and new neighborhoods have these.
• Other taxes, such as Mello Roos bonds in newer neighborhoods.
• Estimated on-going maintenance costs.

Another thing to watch out for with condominiums are "special assessments" which are one-time levies to pay for significant repairs or renovations to the complex.

Aside from the very first expense above, one would have all of the other expenses even if one owned the home outright.

Typically, only the portion of the mortgage payment towards interest and the property taxes are tax-deductible.

How much home can one afford?

One rule I've heard is that one should buy a home that is no more than 2.5-3 times one's gross annual income. I've seen this ratio recommended to be as low as 1.5 and as high as 3.5.  Incidentally, this is what the price-to-income ratio looks in countries around the world.  As of 2014, this ratio is reported as being 2.4 for the US and it is one of the lowest.

Another is that the PITI (principal, interest, taxes, insurance) should be no more than 30% of gross pay, assuming no other significant debt.

Is the home a good value?

There's the cash-flow analysis where all of the expenses listed earlier in this post must be less than what the property would rent for.

Additionally, patrick.net (a now defunct site tracking the housing bubble around 2008) had the following suggestion:

• Annual rent / purchase price = 3% means do not buy.
• Annual rent / purchase price = 6% means borderline.
• Annual rent / purchase price = 9% means OK to buy.

Indeed, I've often heard that the general rule of thumb is that this ratio should be 10%.

Based on the above analysis, some low end condominiums work out to be "OK to buy", but if we were to subtract the HOA dues from the rent, then the ratio falls to where it's no longer favorable to buy. Condominiums are kind of tricky in that way.

Patrick.net provided an awesome "Should you buy that house?" calculator which allowed you to plug in a price for a given and address and used market rents off of craigslist to answer the question for you.  The calculator is no longer active.  However, one can get rent estimates for any given property/ area from Zillow, but those numbers may not be as accurate.

Rent vs Buy Calculator

This is straying from the main topic of the post (which is supposed to be about "rules of thumb"), but I got a note from a friend who suggested adding it. Rent vs Buy calculators, such as this one offered by the NY Times attempt to tell you whether you'd be better off renting or buying depending on things like:

• Current rent,
• Current home value,
• Length of time that one plans to live there,
• Prevailing mortgage rate (no provisions for a variable mortgage rate),
• Projected annual increase/decrease in rent, and
• Projected annual increase/decrease in the home's value.

Since the last 2 of these variables are almost impossible to predict accurately (especially given the current economic climate), it becomes really hard to get any concrete guidance from the calculator. But I guess it is still fun to play with the numbers.

Researching a purchase

These are some of the things one should get answers for when buying a home.

• Research the school district.
• Check with the local police station about crime in that area.
• Age of the home.
• Age of plumbing and electrical systems.
• If any improvements were made, were the necessary permits obtained?
• Have there been any losses or significant damage?
• Check the fire & flood ratings as that will impact insurance.  (Available on Redfin.)
• Check the Walk Score if you care about businesses accessible by walking.

Of course, anything that's broken will probably be caught during the inspection, so this phase is mostly about catching things that may be about to break or that are not covered by a normal home inspection.

For new homes that are not yet built, check the following:

• If considering a single story home, will it be surrounded by any 2-story homes?
• Locations of public utilities such as transformer boxes, fire hydrants, mailboxes, etc.  Will any of those be on your property?

Looking for a home

Here are some websites that allow you to search and view the MLS listings that match a user's criteria.

• Redfin
• Zillow (Includes estimates of price and rent)

Other useful stuff

• Home improvements and Your Taxes
• Home maintenance manual (from 2-10 Home Buyers Warranty) 
• NACA
• Mortgage/loan calculator with amortization schedule
• Tax burden by state
• Interactive map for air quality
• greatschools.org

Update 8/20/2013

Came across this video titled Don't buy a house without checking these 5 things.

The checklist includes: mold, pests, outdated fixtures and wiring, cosmetic headaches like painted over wallpaper and poorly done DIY flooring, and drainage problems.

Update 4/8/2016 

I did end up buying a house in May 2015.

My journey into meditation

I had heard about meditation as a child but it seemed something esoteric and "out there" and I never really bothered exploring it.

Fast forward to 1993-94. I was in graduate school and trying to deal with the pressures of it. Someone asked me to look into meditation saying that I needed to practice detachment. Since I didn't know where to start, I asked for some recommendations and was told to read "Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind" by Shunryu Suzuki. Having had no prior exposure to meditation, I found the book very hard to read. However, I got through it and tried to start practicing. I practiced for a few minutes for a couple of days. Then life got better, I stopped practicing, and I forgot all about it.

Fast forward again to 2002. I was going through a lot of stress in my work and personal life. As a result my physical health started to get affected. A myriad of stress-related symptoms -- high blood pressure, hormonal imbalances, etc. started appearing in my body. I experienced mild panic attacks. The message from the doctors was clear -- I needed to de-stress myself. But how do I do this? Some doctors recommended getting on anti-anxiety medication. I thought it was too early in life to start taking pills that would probably have to continue lifelong, in increasing doses over time. There had to be a better solution.

Around that time I visited India to get checkups from specialists there. They found the same things as the doctors in the US and some said I needed to start treating the symptoms aggressively before they get worse. Rather than starting treatment, I decided to seek some wise people to discuss my problems with. One of those people recommended that I read "Many Lives, Many Masters" by Brian Weiss. I bought the book and read it cover to cover on the flight back to the US. I was so inspired by the story, that I got on the net and searched for Brian Weiss. On his website, he had listed his book titled "Meditation: Achieving Inner Peace and Tranquility in Your Life". Included with the book was a CD with a 20-minute guided meditation. I bought the book and started listening to the CD. The first couple of days I listened to it in the morning and evening. After that, I only listened to it in the evening after work. In the morning, I started practicing "watching the breath" which I had learnt from "Zen Mind, Beginners Mind" several years ago!

A few weeks into this simple practice and I did much better on my health checkups. They started showing normal results, even though they were borderline. This encouraged me to stay with the practice. Since then I've taken other meditation courses. And through the years, I've tried to maintain a regular practice even though the technique used may vary. I'll write about some of those techniques in future posts.

TIPS

(This is a follow-on to my post on worry free investing.)

TIPS is an acronym for Treasury Inflation Protected Securities. The objective of TIPS is very similar to I-Bonds which I described in an earlier post. The idea is to offer a safe investment whose objective is to track the rate of inflation. Basically it is designed to protect the purchasing power of money over time. Again, in my opinion TIPS are one for the best investments available for tax-deferred and tax-exempt accounts such as 401(k)s, IRAs, Roth IRAs, etc.

Unlike I-Bonds the interest rate is fixed, but the principal adjusts with inflation. Every 6 months a fixed rate of interest is paid on the inflation-adjusted principal. At the time of maturity, the holder of the bond either receives the face value of the bond or the inflation adjusted principal, whichever is higher. TIPS are sold in maturities of 5, 10, and 30 years.

The reason why I say that TIPS work best in tax-deferred and tax-exempt accounts is because any changes in the principal due to inflation in a given year are subject to tax in that year. I don't like the idea of paying taxes on changes in principal before the bond matures. Of course, if you need an investment that works similar to TIPS for a taxable account, the right vehicle would be I-Bonds.

There are several ways to own TIPS.

• Mutual funds such FINPX and VIPSX. There are 2 things to be cautious about. The first is expenses. As of this writing, the expense ratio for FINPX is 0.45% and that for VIPSX is 0.25%. Expenses eat into the total return, and given that these investments are just about keeping up with inflation, one should be very careful about fund expenses. The second thing is that funds constantly have to buy and sell bonds on the open market because of investors buying into or selling their position in the fund. As a result, they are subject to market ups and downs.
• Closely related to mutual funds are Exchange Traded Funds (ETFs) such as TIP. This has the same problem as mutual funds -- expenses and being subject to market ups and downs. In addition, one usually has to pay a brokerage fee to buy or sell them since they are traded like stocks. As of this writing the expense ratio of TIP is 0.20%. This is slightly less than for both the mutual funds mentioned above, but you do have to factor in the brokerage transaction fees.
• Holding the bonds directly in a brokerage account till maturity. I think this is best way to own these bonds. Many brokerages offer these for purchase at treasury auctions for no fee. This is how I have been buying them. If this is something of interest, you should check with your brokerage about how to participate in auctions. The bonds are offered only a few times a year. For bonds offerings during the current year, you can look at the schedule put out by the US Treasury. If you decide to go this route, also pay very close attention to those issues marked as "Reissue". Because they are reissues, they essentially command the market price for what the original issue is selling for. I didn't know about this when I first started buying these, but now that I know about it, I probably won't be buying securities from an auction when they are marked as a reissue.

You can get more information on TIPS at TreasuryDirect.

TIPSwatch is a nice blog dedicated to the subject of TIPS.